I was reading that obstacle races are big money makers these days. The most famous one is Tough Mudder, which is from ten to twelve miles long and involves getting zapped with electricity, going through an ice bath, and lots of ways of interacting with mud.
That’s all well and good, but I think we should start the Tough Writer (or maybe Tough Wridder) race. The events will include:
- Somehow getting past a wall of agents and publishers who stand with their backs to you, arms linked, pretending you’re not there;
- Going down a long chute into a vat of rejection letters;
- Climbing a steep cliff face called The First Page;
- Being sucked down into the infamous quicksand Slush Pile;
- Having a group of “friends” and “relatives” pulling on ropes to keep you away from the computer;
- Navigating the Inner Critic Dungeon where you hit yourself repeatedly on the head with a rubber mallet;
- Fighting your way through a crowd of people who are chanting, “Have you written anything I’ve heard of?”
Now that’s what I call tough!