Do you have trouble coping with rejection? Who doesn't?
One solution: learn to anti-generalize. Generalization is the practice of taking one or a couple of instances and making an absolute out of it. It’s the source of many a domestic argument: You NEVER do the dishes! You are ALWAYS late! You NEVER remember our anniversary!
It’s also the way we often react to rejection—whether it’s being rejected when asking for a date or for an increase in pay, or when a manuscript comes back from a publisher or agent.
Instead of saying to ourselves, “I have failed IN THIS INSTANCE,” we begin to generalize (usually with the help of an over-eager Inner Critic) to thoughts like “NOBODY wants to go out with me, or I’ll NEVER get a raise, or NOBODY wants to publish my novel!”
Naturally these kinds of thoughts sap our strength and make it more likely that we’ll give up or at least procrastinate about moving on. Sometimes it triggers a creative block.
If you catch yourself generalizing when you encounter some kind of rejection, remind yourself that it’s never, er, almost never, a good idea!
(Want more tips on the right-brain approach to being more productive? Get my book, "Focus: use the power of targeted thinking to get more done," published by Pearson and available via your local bookshop or Amazon and other online and offline booksellers.)
