Many people have an Inner Critic that says, in essence, “I will stop hounding you when…”. The “when” might be “you stop procrastinating,” or “you make more money,” or “you get your office in order.”
But a funny thing happens. You get your office in order and your Inner Critic magically has found something else to add to the list.
Another Inner Critic trick is to beat you up for what you’re NOT doing even while you’re doing something you should be doing. For example, “Sure, you’re cleaning up your office but you should be at the gym,” or “Sure, you’re at the gym, but you should be cleaning up your office.”
Your Inner Critic will never run out of material. Why? It’s called life. It brings new responsibilities and new possibilities every day. They will just keep on coming (at least until you run out of days—if we’re lucky there’s no Inner Critic in the afterlife, if there is an afterlife).
Does this mean you are doomed to suffer at the hands of your IC for the rest of your life? Fortunately, no. The best antidote is to transform your IC into an Inner Guide. I have a whole program for those who want to get serious about doing that—more information on it HERE.
However, you can make a start right now. Instead of transforming, start by imagining that the IC is a little gargoyle, or whatever image works best for you, on one shoulder. Now imagine that on the other shoulder is an image that represents a constructive, friendly Inner Guide.
When you realize you are being harassed by your IC, in your imagination turn down the sound from that side, shrink the image of the IC, and mentally turn to the other side, the one on which your helpful IG is sitting. Take a deep breath. Listen to his, her, or its version of the situation. It is likely to be something like these:
“Let’s take a small step toward the task you’ve been avoiding. That will make a start.”
“It would be nice to make more money, let’s take a few minutes to think about what we might do to move toward that.”
“We’ll feel more free with an orderly office. Let’s start by clearing one small zone.”
“We can do only one thing at a time. It’s great that we’re improving your fitness by being at the gym right now.”
Notice that the IC is always saying “you” (with a pointing finger); the IG says “we” because it’s on this journey by your side.
Give it a try. I think you might find it helpful. Let me know if you have questions or feedback.
(You'll find many useful strategies for being more productive with less stress in my book, "Focus: use the power of targeted thinking to get more done," published by Pearson and available from Amazon and other online and offline book sellers.)
